sweet, sweet baby...

[warning: proud mommy alert. mass quantities of pictures. enter at own risk.]

july 16 2006

to my sweet peanut,

today is sunday, and it is hard to believe that you are going to be here in less than four days, and you could be here tomorrow. that is so crazy, my little baby. it is hard to imagine who you are and what you will become. what your personality will be. who you will look like. if you're a boy or a girl!!! it's been much harder this time around not knowing. we didn't know with your brother if he was a boy or a girl. but either way, he would change our life forever. now, your arrival brings so much meaning to our "family." will i be a mom of two boys? will big h be a big brother to a little brother or a little sister? oh, the excitement you are bringing t o our life right now is so amazing. peanut, you have been prayed for constantly and by so many people. you have an amazing big brother. i can't wait to see how he will love you. he has so much passion and emotion for life.he is so opinionated, and i think (hope) he's going to be possessive and protective of you, and i pray it will be a beautiful picture of a sibling relationship. peanut, whether you're a boy or a girl, your daddy is already so smitten with you. he is an incredible man with so much love for his family. we are so lucky to have him protecting us physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually.

oh, and peanut I love you! i have prayed for, over, and with you. i can't believe your arrival is so near. i found out that i have high blood pressure, so i have had to lay on my side and not do much activity for a while. we have another doctor's appointment tomorrow, and hopefully our doctor, who we LOVE and trust, will tell us we can hold out until thursday, which is when you're scheduled to get here. the only reason i want to wait until thursday is because i want everyone to be here to celebrate your birthday. nana is coming on tuesday. papa is coming on wednesday. grandma and grandpa are getting here tuesday too. i just want everything to be smooth for your arrival, so we can focus on you. daddy and i are so excited about you getting here. peanut, you are such a gift. i'm sure you will know this by the time you read this, but mommy and daddy had a miscarriage after your brother and before you. so we consider you a miracle. you've provided us with great anticipation.

i am laying in bed tonight praying for your delivery. i am praying that you come smoothly. i so mourned the delivery of your brother. i wanted a "normal" vaginal delivery. but the Lord knew what was best. and because that was such a chaotic and scary delivery, i am praying that you come into the world with a little more peace. i am praying for weentrab. that she feels refreshed when she gets to the hospital, so that she can be a huge part of our day. i am praying for our dr. b and the anesthesiologist team. that they sleep well wednesday night and are full of energy thursday morning. i pray for dr. b and dr. a. that their hands are steady and they have clear heads the morning you get here. i pray for your health. that the Lord has taken good care of you inside me.

peanut, i cannot adequately describe the butterflies i have in my stomach about meeting you. guess it really is Christmas in July around here.

dear Jesus, thank you for peanut.

until we meet. i love you already.

this is the letter i wrote to the goo four nights before she was born. today, july 20, 2007, i celebrate the goo.

dear goo,

it was one year ago today that we welcomed you into our family. one year ago, daddy and i walked down the halls of labor and delivery with butterflies in our stomachs due to all of the anticipation and excitement of your arrival.

we were so excited to have our friend weentrab witness the entire thing. (seriously, weentrab, i will never be able to thank you adequately.)

this delivery was so incredibly smooth. i, of course, didn't sleep a wink the night before. partly because of my ENORMOUS belly. but more so because i could. not. wait. to meet you.

your daddy is the best daddy in the world. he told me jokes that morning while i was having my IV put in. (apparently, i am a hard stick.) but he was also serious and sentimental when it was time.

they wheeled me into the OR. i had no saliva whatsoever. i just wanted to meet you. i wanted to know you. i wanted to envision your gender. everything went so smooth. your daddy prayed the entire time the doctors were getting mommy open.

which worked because i was more calm in those several minutes than i had been in several weeks.

and then, all of the sudden, dr. a said, "well, hello sweetheart."

i just knew.

i just knew you were a girl.

and goo, i am welling up with tears as i type this because i can't begin to put my excitement and pure joy into words. i will never do that feeling any justice.

buz went over to look at you and watch you get cleaned, while my sweet weentrab just sat right next to me, reassuring me that she hadn't left me. it was such a surreal moment to say, "weentrab, i have a girl. i have a girl." she was elated.

they brought you over to me, and i couldn't really see you, but i will never forget that smell. the combination of the clean OR smell and your sweetness. oh your sweetness.

everything went fine, and they wheeled us back into the room. buz said that he would run out into the waiting room to tell our family what you were and what your name was. but i SO wanted to do it myself. of course, they knew from the fact that i wanted to tell them, that you were a girl. but it didn't take away from the joy i experienced in introducing you to them. to say they were excited was an understatement.

we just sat there, dumbfounded. we couldn't believe the Lord had bestowed this incredible gift upon us. you were more beautiful than i ever could have imagined. all i wanted was to be close to you.

and then.

we got to introduce you to your brother. oh, goo. this little guy was so excited to meet you. "baby! baby! daddy, baby! yook, baby! pitty guhl! i yuv her!"

and goo, as smoothly as you entered this earth, so have you been in personality.

finally, a baby i could cuddle. a baby who would go to sleep nursing. (not that you were EVER a good nurser. but i won't hold it against you.) i never thought i would love having a girl this much. you rounded out our family. our family is complete. i love buying pink things. i love matching your shoes with your outfits. i love putting bows in your hair, even though technically you don't have enough hair to do so. i love always making sure you have bloomers on when you wear a dress. i love when you fall asleep in the car, and i get to do the "lift and lay" and lay you fast asleep in your crib.

i love giving you your bottle. if you ever think of a way for me to thank your aunt and uncle for introducing the bottle to you, please let me know. there are so many things in motherhood that i have had to mourn. one of those things was that i didn't get to nurse you until you were at least twelve months. but dr. g said 8 months was great. so i'm taking his word for it. but on the flip side, there is nothing i love more than feeding you your bottle. you sink into the pit on my elbow and just snuggle. your head sweats (like mine), and you enjoy every minute of it. i love that your dad and i farkle (rock, paper, scissors) for who gets to put you to bed at night because both of us want to do it so badly. don't think i don't cheat a lot. actually, daddy gives in because he's just that kind of guy.

speaking of daddy. wow, goo, you have one 37-year-old man wrapped around that cute little pinky of yours. that poor boy who comes to the door to ask you out on your first date. i will pray for him now.

actually, there is someone else that will be worse than dad. your brother. i don't even know where to begin. that poor future suitor. God bless his soul. big h loves you more than he knows what to do with. literally, some days he wants to hold you and cuddle with you so much that he ends up squeezing too hard. and his response? "but mama, i just yuv her so much. sometimes i just want to skeez her. i'm sorry i skeez her yots, mama. sometimes i can't help it." goo, you are his very best friend. he would go to the ends of his little earth for you. he wants you to be involved in everything. he wants to read all of his books to you. he wants to introduce all of his trains to you. he tells you EVERY. TIME. he goes poop on the potty. and really...you're the first one he tells. (lucky you?) he holds your hand when you're asleep in the car. he shows you his dance moves. he explains to you who each backyardigan is. he wants so badly to teach you sign language. he sings songs to you when he can tell you're really tired. and more often than not, it puts you to sleep because he sings "extra ky-it." you don't ever laugh as hard as when he's messing with you. he asks daddy and me every night if you can take his bath with him. when we're getting ready to leave and get in the car, he always without a doubt says, "mama, don't forget about baby." and no question, my VERY FAVORITE thing he does with/for you is the minute you wake up. he walks in your room, puts his hands on his hips like daisy duke used to do on the dukes of hazard and says in a slow, southern drawl "where's my gooey?" seriously, your mama almost cries every morning. and then he asks, "baby, how did you sleep? i swept so good. i had pleasant dreams. did you have pleasant dreams too?" and then, he invites you into the living room to play with toys with him while i make breakfast? that is the best part of my day. next to putting you to bed at night, of course. but i already said that.

because you're not the first kid, you don't get regular naps. you just go with the flow. we just do big h's stuff, and you go along for the ride. that's who you are. we started nicknaming you "the shaft" because you always get the shaft. big h is always first in deciding what to do for the day. we are constantly saying, "oh yeah, we can do that. it won't matter to the goo. she can just do whatever."

your physical characteristics. besides being the most beautiful woman i have ever seen, you have one feature i could look at all day. your toes. they are so much fun. your third toe on each foot kind of has her own personality. she likes to be above the rest. a little superiority complex, if you will. and big h wants to eat your "keency" toes pretty much every minute of the day.

you go all day without a word. and then, around five o'clock in the afternoon, you announce to us that you've had enough. it's time for things to be about you now. move aside, big h. it's goo time. and we love that about you.

goo, you bring me more joy that i ever could have imagined. i love you with every ounce of my soul. thank you for becoming that missing part of our family. happy birthday, sweet gooey. here's to many more.

1 month

2 months

3 months

4 months

5 months

6 months

7 months

8 months

9 months

10 months

11 months

here's to you, sweet goo.

couscous and fine linens

make no mistake. my kid is quirky. really quirky, in fact. but to be honest, it's one of the biggest reasons i have fallen head over heals in love with big h.

the other day i was at the grocery store, and i was so bored with what we've been having for dinner these days. (buz...don't even go there. and for those of you who don't know buz, he was going to say, "um, pretty, you don't cook. what are you bored with?") anyway, i was walking down the carbohydrate, i mean, pasta aisle, and i began salivating. it was wonderful. i was in the midst of so much culinary loveliness. spiral pasta, penne pasta, elbow, lasagna, rotini, angel hair...i could go on and on. but i won't.

don't think i don't want to.

my point...

right. i was in the pasta aisle, and a box jumped out at me. it didn't literally jump out at me. but it did catch my eye, i should say. a box of couscous. i've always heard it talked about but never tried. surprising seeing as how it is part of the carb family and all. so i bought a box. parmesan flavored. and cooked it the other night.

yeah, guess who LOVES couscous? my insanely picky eater. and i just don't have the heart to tell him that it's couscous. i can hear him, "coos what? i don't yike that. no thank you."

so because i am incredibly witty and intelligent. i outfoxed him. again. i called it little ball pasta. and he has continuously asked for it ever since. i'm smiling and laughing as i write. i am too smart for my own good.

yesterday, we went to a local mall with one of my best buddies from high school. poor her. my son is in love with her son who is about seven or eight months younger than big h. and for some reason, every time we get together, big h hugs AND kisses him. buz, pretend like you didn't read any of that. :)

and yes, we went to a mall. again. is it possible that i miss the rain? it is so bloody hot. (buz doesn't think i do a very mean british accent, but i try.) hot. i can't mention enough how hot it is. i am letting out so many sighs right now. there is absolutely nothing you can do to cool off other than swim or shower all day. and i think my husband might not be proud of my mothering if he knew that all i did all day was shower. and swimming is out right now because of the goo's crawling capabilities. taking the two of them to a pool is next to impossible. unless i was ok with goo crawling on the pavement and taking a nosedive into the shallow end.

no thank you.

so malls, it is. the other night, i changed big h's sheets. i only have one pair of sheets for his bed. honestly, because i'm lazy. so i hadn't had a chance to finish drying them, and i had some that my mom gave me from our old house. they are dark green. big h's bed has a train quilt, and his other sheets are blue and white gingham. so the dark green ones are quite a contrast. if i were trying really hard to look at it from his perspective. so that night, he was ready for bed and told dad that these sheets were very crazy and funny and he would like the other ones, please. well, that wasn't an option.

so my kid slept on top of his quilt.

have i mentioned how quirky he is? and have i mentioned how much i love him?

so yesterday, we're at the mall at one of our favorite stores. (i had high hopes of taking him somewhere inside the mall to pick out some sheets. he's one of those kids that if he picks something out, he is ok with change.) so, big h is playing and he sees some bunk beds and says, "mama, yook at that. that's like my bed, huh? i yike those sheets. they are much better than those crazy ones at home. can we get them?" picks out his own pottery barn sheets. not the tractor ones. or the dinosaur ones. or the pirate island ones. or any kid-looking ones. nope. the ones that perfectly match his quilt. i love my kid. :)

and then, because sometimes i can't contain all of my thoughts in perfect paragraph form, i will now use my bullet points to convey some of my latest thoughts.

• potty training has actually been fun. don't quote me on that, and honestly, i can't believe i just said it out loud. and i sure don't want big h to know. because for posterity's sake, don't think i'm not totally going to embellish every story to make it sound so much worse. but i want the world to know. i am so glad i waited so long. big h is ready. and he is loving it. we ate at schlotzsky's with some friends today after coming down the slide like farm animals. i was busy helping the goo with something, and my bff took her kid and big h to the bathroom. when he returned from the restroom, he said as loud as he could, "MAMA! GUESS WHAT I PUT IN THE POTTY? POOP! I PUT POOP IN THE POTTY!" couldn't help but smile.
• this is a tribute to my two buddies who were once sandwich artists at subway. jill, my roommate from college, and marina, big h's best friend cj's mommy. they were sandwich artists, when sandwich making really was an art. (and don't get me started about how marina actually went to a sandwich making conference. and if my memory serves me correctly, i believe she may have won an award. i am in awe, people.) i don't want to offend anyone who currently works at subway. but here's my question: what is the deal with not cutting the "V" in the bread anymore? why do they just cut it in half? wasn't part of the specialty of subway the "V?" i miss the V. anyone else miss the V?
• um, my daughter turns ONE this friday?????? period.
• my nephew is coming next thursday.
• my best friend lives up north. and when i say north, i mean, she has to have a passport to go to her nearest grocery store. and she probably jokes that i live so far south that i need a passport to get to my local grocery store. oh, how i wish we lived in the same vicinity. no such luck. any way. let me just say, for the record, that i must apologize to those of you reading. it was actually hotter there today than it was here. and mind you, these people do NOT have air conditioners. they went to home depot to get a little a/c unit, and they were out. because they only had 14 to begin with. my apologies for complaining and whining.

and you know me...always have to share life through pictures...

if you look closely, you will see him making a fish face with his mouth. that is his "holding my breath face."

no caption necessary.

and i can't think of any place they would rather be than with each other...

it's like christmas in july

or kind of.

i have tried my very hardest not to post much about our potty training endeavors. mainly because i was afraid i would jinx myself. yes, i said jinx myself. and no, i'm not in seventh grade. but also, i could NOT compare with the posts from jen over at lots of scotts. talk about turning a subject like human waste into beautiful posts. and to be honest, i did not want to have to admit defeat. because that is the road i thought i would be going down.

so all that said, i will go ahead with it. i will talk about my kid's bathroom habits, and i will do so with confidence.

i will say again: if you are not my best friend living in montana or my mother or mother-in-law, you can just check your email or do some internet surfing. because this is probably way too much information. and i am entirely TOO happy for my little family. so i cannot be responsible for my diarrhea of the mouth.

don't say you weren't warned.

we tried potty training several months ago, and to be honest, i wasn't that into it. what other parents do NOT tell you is that it is more the parent than the kid who has to be ready to potty train. or at least in our case. we tried, but without much success. let's just say i was doing a LOT of cleaning. and big h was so not into it. i mean, he liked the eggs treats (peanut m'n'm's) and all, but it got to the point of him going really only because he was hungry for a snack. "hmmm...i'm hungry. and mom said no snack. oh wait! i can get eggs treats if i sit on the potty and do 'something.' yeah, eggs treats. that's a perfect snack."

so last week, on the fourth of july, independence day nonetheless, i decided to go ahead with it. seeing as how he's about to be FOUR, you know. but big h has always done things in his own time. and to be honest, he's always been a late at getting things. we love this kid.

we decided that if he went #1, he would get a sticker. after 3 stickers, he would get to pick something out of the treasure chest. these items included diego socks from the target dollar spot, little paddle balls for sixty cents at the party store, star sunglasses, etc. they varied in size, price, etc. but after 3 stickers, he got something tangible. now, my kid is pretty smart. and there were times he would sit on the potty, do his business, get a sticker, and go back and repeat two more times. just to get the three stickers. i mean, he wasn't born yesterday. we had a couple of accidents. i didn't do a timer or a bell or anything because big h does NOT like timing objects. they stress him out. so before our next activity, i would have him go sit on the potty. and it worked. we went to a friend's house the first day. he had an accident. not a problem. went to a friend's house day #2. no accidents. ??? went and played at his old school on day #3. no accidents. this continued throughout the weekend. the only time he would have accidents was when he would poop. he would poop in his underwear. nice. or he would wait until nighttime when he was in his pull-up. and then, we would change it, and he would go to sleep after being changed. but i was so stinking proud of my little man. seriously. my little man who was wearing little man underwear. with a cute little tush, i might add.

we have had a racetrack in the garage. in plain eye view. and we told big h that whenever he went poop on the potty, he could have the track. along with a LOT of other things. like dinner at chuck e cheese.

so today. one week later. first, we got up and had the goo's ONE YEAR pictures taken. yes, my sweet baby is going to be one next week. don't even get me started. i will post some eye candy for you in a minute. we took pictures. and then headed to the local mall to play and to get big h a special thomas for doing such a great job with the goo's pictures. we ended up meeting some friends there. somehow big h sat in something wet right when he got there, so we were already walking on thin ice changing into our one other pair of shorts so early in the morning. and being away from the house. we went the bathroom a couple of times. i was so proud of my little man. had lunch, and we were about ready to head home, when i smelled the goo. so we all headed to the place that i love with all my heart and soul. i told big h that before we got in the car, we needed to change the goo's poop. and he responded with, "and mine, too?"

that is so not what i wanted to hear.

mind you, "we" were in our second pair of shorts already. apparently, i underestimated little man.

so i changed the goo. no problem. never a problem. other than she doesn't like to be changed. which is a problem.

then, big h gets on the changing table in the bathroom in the mall. and just so you know...this is the part where i really, really want to give you too much information.

but i won't.

you're welcome.

let's just say the underwear went immediately in the trash and the clothes went in the plastic bag that i had with me.

and big h had on his last pair of underwear. which happened to be his BLACK pair of cars underwear with ramone on them.

and his crocs.

and the goo's pink silk blanket.

we were a sight. to put it mildly. (oh, how i wish i had my camera.)

luckily, the two people i was with just laughed with me and found it humorous. and that was the only thing to do. to laugh.

and it was sad because big h didn't really even know that LOTS of people at the mall were staring at him. so naive. bless his sweet little poopingallovertheplace heart.

the story gets better.

we come home, and big h and i nap in my bed for TWO HOURS! bliss. pure toddler and mommy bliss. of course, when he woke up, he said in such a sweet voice, "mama, i love dad so much." deep breath. the goo took a two-and-a-half hour nap. more bliss. and she woke up with a smile that said, "mama, i love you more than anyone! you are my very favorite person ever." or at least i think that's what she would have said.

but before she woke up, big h and i were playing in his room with his new thomas. he was making a funny face. i wasn't sure what the face was. but i have always seen my mom friends with kids who are already potty trained ask their children if they need to use the restroom after making awkward faces. so i assumed this was his issue. honestly, i had no idea. :) but i asked him to go ahead and go sit on the potty anyway. he did. and while he was in there, i heard him say, "hmmm...that's weird. i think that's poop in there." (those of you who know big h know his little voice and how his little conversations sound.) i was laughing. until i realized what he might be saying. and then, i heard him say, "um, mama, i think there is poop in my yittle potty. come yook."

and the angels rejoiced and sang a beautiful song!!!!!

lo and behold, there was poop in the toilet people.

so don't think we didn't get the racetrack out immediately. and dad was blindsided by how fast we got in the car once he got home from work. straight to dinner. and we called nana and grandma, and the rest of the people who live in our neighborhood. and city. and state. it was such a fun night.

hats off to you, little man.

and to think that i was strolling around a mall today with my little man in his black skivvies, his bright red crocs, and his sister's pink silk blanket.

and for the piece de resistance. some of the goo's one year pictures. seriously, weentrab, how many times i can blow steam your way? miracle worker. as i've said before, she will be fighting the boys off with sticks. sticks, i tell you.

goo, you are breathtaking. mommy loves you.




don't deny it -- you want to eat her up. you know you do.

and just so you know. my daughter is SUCH a trooper. it was about ninety-four degrees outside this morning at 9 AM. not to mention the 184 percent humidity. and i made her wear this hat anyway. because i hate to be biased and all, but she looks so stinking cute in hats. see???




so there. i'm done. and if you've stuck with me through the whole thing, you are two devoted readers. (i.e. thanks, mom. thanks, kelly.)

and it appears that i am only posting once a week. am doing my best to declutter my house these days. the clutter. and well, it's taken over my life, and i can't take it anymore. so that's where i've been. you know, if you've wondered or anything.

oh, and one more thing. the day at the park last week with some friends? yeah, my beloved weentrab put the morning to a musical slideshow. yeah, she's that friend who you love to hate. talented, beautiful. and the worst part? she's so incredible nice. it makes you want to vomit.

here's something for you to enjoy.

true definition of holiday

avoid reading if you have small children. the picture below could be harmful.

it is july fourth. independence day. big h is with buz at a fourth of july neighborhood parade. (seriously, he is dad of the year. i, for one, cannot imagine getting out in this humidity on purpose.) it is 9:30 am. i am sipping some cinnamon coffee, and this is what is happening in the other room...

seriously.

independence day.

i told you not to read, didn't i?

a sort of mommy journal, if you will

(potentially boring post. probably more for kelly who lives far away, bff who is in another country right now, and the grandparents who love to hear the mundane details of parenting little ones.)


buz has the night off. meaning, he gets to do anything he wants tonight. see any movie he wants. go to gamestop and stay as long as he wants. tip as much as he wants at hooters or twin peaks. wait...no. that wasn't part of the deal. in fact, that will never be part of any deal. scratch that.


i put both kiddos to bed. only after a 5:30 grocery trip to target. having big h along was a beautiful experience. and contrary to what the tone of my post might suggest, there is no sarcasm. it really was fun. he is at a really fun age, where he is so observant. and wow...he makes comments about everything. and his comments are clearly spin offs of things that i have said before.


"yook mama. there is cimmonun roes. they are so soft and chewy. these are good for beck-pest. and boy, they really goes good with coppee, huh? i don't yike coppee. it's yucky."


"mama, baby YOVES these hot dogs (referring to the little gerber meat sticks that smell so disgusting, but the goo loves them). i will get yots por her, ok?"


"mama, i think we should go yook just a yittle bit at the toys. now, we won't go buy any, but we sure can yook a yittle bit, ok?"


"now, don't porget baby's diapers. you know...she's a baby, and diapers keep poop and pee on her bottom and not her cyose (clothes)."


seriously, i have to say i thoroughly enjoyed our trip through target. no fits. no crying. no whining. just pure enjoyment. about everything.


and they officially bathe together. i got the goo a bath seat at a consignment sale yesterday, so buz tried it out last night. and i gave it another shot tonight. she absolutely LOVES being his sister. she just sits there and soaks him in (no pun intended). and to hear him talk to her, he wants so much to be her mommy.


"baby, it's not good to sip on that water. if you want water, you need to ask mommy, and she will get you bubble water in a cup with a yid from the kishen. baby, you want to play with this ducky? baby, you need another toy? baby, you have to cyose your mouth when mama washes your hair or you will choke yots. when water goes in your mouth, you choke yots. you don't need ear pyugs. only special big boys like me need ear pyugs. baby what cuh-yer jammies you going to weared tonight? i will wear stripey. i love stripey jammies. they are my favorite ever. you have favorite jammies. baby, what was the best part of your day? mine was when mommy pixed us beck-pest." and she just stares at him and cackles.


i'm telling you, when we have things planned for the day, the day goes by so smooth. i knew i was going to give buz the night off sometime during the day. we had plans to hang out with aunt biscuit (my friend bitsy) and her son andrew, aka "anzoo." we went to pump it up for a little open play. basically, there are 2 rooms with inflatable play "things," for lack of a better term. big h had so much fun. but for some reason, there was one "thing" that he didn't want to do by himself. it was a "ladder" that you walk up and then you go down a very, very big slide. he kept saying he didn't want to go by himself. and andrew wasn't going to cut it. i kept using the excuse that i had to hold the goo. but then, my lovely and oh-so-devoted friend piped up and said, "oh i'll hold the goo. you go slide with big h." nice. ok. i'm one of those moms who can do things with my kid so that he won't be scared. i swing on the swing sets with him. i play at the playground with him. i could do this. so biscuit watches big h and me head up the "ladder" and get ready to come down the slide. let me think for a minute about how to adequately describe the scene. without sounding like i have a poor self esteem, just picture a cow or horse or other farm animal coming down a 30-foot slide. get the picture? oh, and the best part? big h LOVED it and responded with "YET'S DO IT AGAIN, MAMA!!!!" all the while, aunt biscuit laughing her hiney off. big h is very comfortable with biscuit, so i asked big h in my most excited voice ever, "HEY BIG H! WANT AUNT BISCUIT TO GO DOWN WITH YOU TOO?" he was elated at the thought. ahhh...sweet revenge. who was laughing now?


let's just say biscuit and i bonded today like never before.


tonight, as i sit and write, i listen to big h tell stories and "read" books. the funniest and most amazing thing is that we bathe him, read him stories, and talk to jesus. then, we tuck him in and close the door. a couple of months ago, he got out of bed, turned on his light, and started playing with his trains. at first, buz and i thought through this about whether or not to discipline him. we toyed with the idea, but it was a day that he had taken a really long nap. very unusual for him. after about thirty minutes, he had turned off his light and gotten into bed and gone to sleep. and now, every night, we do our routine, but we don't turn off the light. he plays with his trains and reads books on the floor. and after about twenty to thirty minutes, he turns off his light and gets under the covers and goes to sleep. i love this little man. love him.


and don't quote me or hold me to this, but i think we start "camp underwear" tomorrow. several different times today, he's talked about underwear and potties and pooping in the potty and getting treats. we tried before, but we had too many accidents. i was going to start a week from yesterday, but i think i can get my game on and start tomorrow. (oh, and i just informed buz of this. seeing as how he doesn't have to work and all.)


speaking of buz, don't even get me started. i called him at 11 to see where he was because that's just late for him. i emailed his blackberry and asked him to email, text, or call me and let me know he was ok. thinking he would text me from the movie he was seeing or from the sports bar where he was watching espn. when i didn't hear from him, i bit the annoying wife bullet and called his cell. and he answered. from. his. office.


buz is in trouble. period.


i'm pretty sure i don't have anything else to ramble on about.


except, here are my father-in-law's birthday presents.


first of all, weentrab, don't be mad. i promise i'm not a traitor. i just couldn't get in to see you because you have been ultra booked. but don't think i'm letting you off the hook for the goo's one-year pictures. (fyi: my father-in-law is german.)





and to those who are reading this late at night and can't put two and two together, my father-in-law is also a yale alumni. and could eat up his grandkids.